Déjà vu all over again ;-)

Oh my gosh!
Tonight I watched another episode of MTV's Made and it ws the one about a girl called Rachel Faust who was like an outcast at school who wanted to be hot and have a date for a ball at school.
That is so me!!! I was just shocked and couldn't believe it. On the one hand I just wanted to switch it off cause I knew all the bad things I've been through would come up again, but then - I just couldn't. Something forced me to watch the entire show...
This was so shocking and horrible - as if I had to re-live my past once more!
It was as if everything from my past came back to punish me again.
But it also had something good. I realized it wasn't as bad anymore. I mean, it was still bad to think about it, but I didn't get this feeling of being one big fool/idiot, you name it...
Especially cause there's this one guy to whom I'd like to say 'thanks'... Thanks for being mean, cause it made me the person I am now, thanks for being nice to me during the last 2 years, thanks for singing a song during math lessons to distract me, thanks...
It might sound weird, but yes, I'd like to thank this one person! He might have treated me like sh** from 8th grade on, but yet, I'd still be the innocence in person... I even wished I'd have become the new me earlier, cause then I probably wouldn't be so sarcastic about relationships, but that's another story.
Well, I could have lived without those horrible years of being treated like sh** (1st -9th grade!), but who knows what else it will be good for in the future?